amelia-hurricane-shepherd:

Amelia sighed, locking eyes with the other woman for a
moment,  then dropping them back.  “Maybe we’re not.
Maybe the happiness parade everyone else gets to join
is reserved for them. We just get to watch from the side
lines.  But that doesn’t mean our lives can’t be worth it.
We get to do what no one could for us. We save people
who otherwise wouldn’t have made it.  We save them–
and we save their families from our pain. That’s– I have
to believe that counts for something; that it matters.”

           Honestly, it was the only thing that got her through  – and
           Teddy  knew as well as anyone  some days even that  was
           not enough.  But it had to be, anyway. At least, that’s what
           she told herself. If she saved enough lives, maybe one day
           it would even out against all she had lost.

“It  does  count  for  something,”  Teddy  said
quietly.  “We  wouldn’t  be human, otherwise.”
She  knew  the  p a i n  Amelia spoke of, and
knew it well enough that she  wouldn’t wish it
on  anyone.  Those  families  she had spared
from the  loss she  endured  ——  she  didn’t
need thanks, so long as Henry knew that she
was doing it for him. 

          And maybe that was enough  ——  maybe that
          would be what made Henry’s death worthwhile.
          Though no number  of  lives  she  saved  could
          e v e r  stand  for  the  place Henry  held  in her
          heart,  maybe it might  ease her  p a i n  some
          knowing that other wives, other children would
          not have to suffer like she did.